Of course, you want the best life you possibly can have. We all do. But when it comes to living out that dream by starting your own business, pursuing your ideal career, or whatever that ideal may be, nothing’s happening.
Countless self-help books, articles, and blog posts promise to get you where you want to be, and they all make it sound so easy. Yet you’re not making any progress toward where you’d like to be. You still don’t think it could happen, at least not for you.
In short, your self-confidence needs a boost.
It’s not possible to realize your dreams and start living the life you truly desire if you lack self-confidence. You’ll never overcome the false poor self-image you have.
Maybe you perceive yourself as economically lacking and pinned your hopes on winning the lottery. But many past winners end up back in the same economic boat because finances aren’t the real issue.
Maybe you perceive yourself as unlovable or unworthy. But many people who feel they’ve found the perfect partner find the relationships fall apart anyway because partners’ lack of perfection isn’t the real issue.
Your experiences in life reflect who you consider yourself to be. This is true in every component of your life. If you have the mindset that you’re financially lacking, unlovable, or unworthy, you will be.
But don’t despair. You’re worried about it, but you don’t have to be anymore. You can shift your attention off of your poor self-conception—which is preventing you from being confident enough to be the true you—and focus instead on the ideal version of you.
Here are the steps you can start taking right now. If you follow them consistently, your current limiting perceptions of yourself will disappear and be replaced by a higher level of self-confidence.
- Be aware.
The first step in making permanent changes is to become more self-aware. Think about how your self-confidence deficit manifests in your everyday life. What do you leave undone because you don’t think you’re capable of finishing? What choices have you settled for, and continue to make? In what areas have you been feeling unworthy? How have you been beating yourself up?
Notice the things you tell yourself Recognize the limitations you believe you have. Discern whether these things are true, or just self-imposed limitations you’ve been accepting as true. If you do this, your self-confidence will begin to take root and blossom.
- Develop a game plan.
A significant part of the problems surrounding low self-confidence is living every day without a plan to get to where you want to be. Begin by creating a mental image of steps you could implement today, and how you could complete them. If you want a fulfilling, exciting, awesome life, then employ actionable ideas that would propel you toward that fulfilling, exciting, and awesome life.
Your ideal life won’t just magically materialize to you. You need to take action to make it work. So, start drawing up workable game plans for the rest of the day, tomorrow, next week, and beyond.
- Highlight victories, even minor ones.
It’s progressively difficult to have faith in yourself if you constantly feel you must obtain someone else’s approval, and that you won’t be able to feel good about yourself if you don’t get it. But relying on others for your happiness is not a sustainable way to live. Encourage yourself isn’t self-absorbed or self-centered—it’s healthy and necessary.
To stop people-pleasing from holding you back, you need to believe in yourself no matter what other people think. Each day you experience or accomplish something that feels good. You don’t have to wait for others’ approval or validation before you give yourself the pat on the back that you deserve.
- Don’t set unreachable goals.
Too many people shoot for the moon, then get discouraged when they land on the stars instead. One common thread in athletic training across many disciplines is to set a series of reachable goals. This will hone your focus to work on doing one thing better today than yesterday.
Be more like an athlete: focus on a definable achievement every day, even if it may seem minor. What could you do better than before? Start small, and keep making progress. This will raise your confidence in your abilities, which will make you feel better about yourself—better enough to attempt something more ambitious tomorrow. You’ll surely achieve that, too!
- Follow your passions.
If you lack direction in your life, find something you’re passionate about and pursue it. Passions bring out a beautifully breathtaking light in people. Think back to a time when you were with somebody who was engulfed in passion about what they were doing. Their burning enthusiasm was contagious, right?
Following your passion will fill you with beauty and flood your life with meaning. It increases confidence by filling your life with purpose. Release yourself to discover and follow passion. You have nothing to lose, and you’ll gain a supply of self-confidence you can draw on.
How has self-confidence, or a lack of it, affected you? Imagine what’s possible for you if you could shed all of those false and negative beliefs about yourself!